Every month I get these mean little pieces of paper saying I owe someone some money. Bla bla bla, I'd rather ignore them, but they do need to get paid. So while I'm out spending my cash (or yours) on arcade games, food, and well, whatever else I want, I expect one of you subbies to take care of my bills so I don't have to.

(I use Alertpay for this, so if you don't have it *sign up right fucking now*, or just email me and I'll tell you how much cash to send me.)

I can even set your lame-ass up on a monthly payment plan! Isn't that exciting! So you can adopt the same bill every month with ease, and without some other pet getting to it first! Email me for details.

Adopt bills for the month of May:

Open for adoption  PAID - open for reimbursement